Date Night Project :: Charcoal Sketching

On our most recent date night on Monday just gone, we made homemade pizzas together and we also  sketched/drew head portraits of each other with charcoal. 

The pizza was delicious as always and, thanks to a fellow blogger we were let in on the the secret to making a professional pizza! It worked a treat. Can't believe I never realized how it was done?!

Upon finishing our yummy pizzas, in a candlelit setting on the balcony, we then pulled out the sketch pad and charcoal sticks. We probably spent about a half hour sketching each other before revealing our finished artwork to the other person... we had a good chuckle! Neither of our drawings looked like our subject but it was a lot of fun. I have displayed our portraits in a couple of square frames.

The picture in the middle was a little creation of mine. Created by 'smacking' a bunch of kisses onto some sketch paper (possibly a little odd)! I plan to hang all 3 frames horizontally above our bed. This was a great date night project... give it ago!

 

I quit Sugar :: Week 5

Week 5 was great! It was the first week since starting the detox that I didn't feel like I was struggling with my cravings. Up until week 5 I had this horrible feeling [and desire] that I was going to have a huge chocolate and lolly binge as soon as the detox ended. It sounds terrible but I was even looking forward to the finish line and then having a 'pig-out'!

Week 5 and now part way into week 6 I am feeling great, particularly this week. Although my cravings were diminishing last week I was struggling with headaches and some nausea but, having read the relevant chapter in my I quit Sugar book, it mentioned that some people at that point in the program would start to feel unwell. Its your body going through withdrawals and its a good thing! 

I'm also looking at the 'sweets' in the stores and on marketing material and thinking how disgusting (I can't think of a better word to best describe my feeling) it is, as oppose to wanting it. I just don't have the desire to eat them. ITS FANTASTIC!

Below is the 'Sweet Green Meal-in-a-Tumbler' that I blended up yesterday, its really yummy.

Sweet Green Meal-in-a-Tumbler
Recipe from 'I Quit Sugar' by Sarah Wilson

So I've been really loving all the 'flower crowns' out there. They are delightfully pretty and feminine. But it's kind of an indie look which I don't tend to pull off. It's not really my style. I'd love to give it a go though and thought I might try my hand at making one. They are so easy to make! 

You will need: 

Pliers

Faux flowers of your choice. $2 shops and spotlight stock them.

Head band 

Floral tape (opt.)

Floral wire (you won't need this if your flowers are wired)

If your faux flowers are wired just coil each one around the headband in an arrangement of your choice. Trim stems with pliers if need be. If your flowers aren't wired, hold flower at the stem in desired position and begin wrapping the floral wire around both headband and flower. 

Continue adding flowers until you get the desired look. The floral tape can be used to cover any 'mess' or sharp ends. Alternatively you could hot glue some felt on the inside to give a neat finish.

Click here for some other ideas.

DIY Candle Jar

Pour some soil into a medium size jar. Use enough soil that you don't have to reach too far down to light the candle.

Sit a tea light candle on top of the soil, pushing down slightly to position.

Tie several rounds of string around the jar at about the level of the soil so that it hides the tea light. I used cooking twine but raffia would look  great. 

Add a few simple faux flowers and your done! 

I doubt anyone would need instructions for this but thought I'd share. Its so simple and pretty.

I Quit Sugar :: Week 4

Hmmm... well... on Saturday evening I went out to dinner with the sisterhood girls and we dined at the 'Buzz Cafe Restaurant'. Such a lovely restaurant with mellow music, soft lighting and a gorgeous view overlooking the water. It was so lovely to be dining in such wonderful company with great food and a relaxed atmosphere. 

However, the night took a turn much unexpected when all six of the girls I was dining with suddenly pounced on me like a cat to wool, and they tied me to my chair! Before me they set the most amazing desert I'd seen, it was some kind of almond chocolate panforte with a dollop of ice cream and a drizzle of strawberry syrup. And well, they gang fed me! Spoonful after spoonful, it was just dreadful and it tasted awful.

Okay so your after the true story right? Well yes I did eat an amazing desert and no it didn't taste awful. We had all ordered our meals and all but two meals were brought to the table. Myself and a friend didn't recieve our meals with the others and after some time we brought it to the waitresses attention. By now the other girls had just about finished their meals. The kitchen staff had made an error and they were very apologetic and gave us all a free desert to make up for it. Hmmm, yes, what was I to do? Everyone was getting a free desert off the menu because I and another didn't get our meals on time and, I kind of felt like I deserved the desert. The best part was that it was free and the worse part was that I broke my detox with no good reason. Theres no excuse and I am feeling quite guilty, so much that I wasn't even going to mention it on here but I wanted to continue to be transparent on this journey of mine, and now you know my weakness! My detox continues.

Coco-nutty Granola Recipe by Sarah Wilson. Great for breakfast or an afternoon snack.

On a better note, I have otherwise been enjoying not having so much junk food in my life. As I've become more aware of the sugar content in foods I've also realized how much rubbish I had been filling my body with. On a much too frequent basis. It is such an awesome feeling to have done away with my habitual sweet-snacking. I usually make healthy substantial dinners and I can't believe that I was counteracting that by having a packet of lollies here and there! I mean, what was the point of making sure we have healthy meals if I was only going to eat lollies and chocolates in between?! 

Thanks to the detox program I've been able to replace my unhealthy snacks with some wholesome ones which still taste great!

Above is a picture of some Coco-Nutty Granola that I made using [homemade] activated nuts. Granola is great for breaky or morning/afternoon tea. I like to serve it with natural yogurt and, have found it to be quite filling (hubby thinks not so much). 

Now you're all probably wondering how hubby is going with the detox? Well he was doing great until Fathers Day came around and, he decided to eat the tasty celebratory foods offered at morning tea after church... he caved. I had actually thought he was doing away with the detox but on Monday he was back to the 'sugar free' ways. I didn't realize until a few days later. He's not much of a sweet tooth nor a sugar addict so even if he had discontinued detoxing he would not have hindered me. I'm a hindrance to myself as you've learnt already! 

Poached Egg with Bacon. A yummy sunday breakfast.

September Date Nights

Its been over a month since we introduced date nights, and it's been really great to have that one night of the week set aside just for each others company.

We didn't have date night last Monday because we had family visiting from interstate but here is a whats on for the next 4 weeks.

2nd sept - no date night, family visiting.

9th sept - poker night *wink wink

16th sept - We're going to make pizza together and then draw portraits of each other (good luck to me, I  can't even draw scribble).

23rd sept - A 'French' theme night. We going to cook a French dinner and watch Amelie, a french movie.

30th sept - Cheese and wine on the balcony. Discuss date night ideas for the next month.

Are you up to the challenge?

If you follow me on Instagram you may have noticed that I posted a pic of some Batic fabric given to me by my brother. I was asking if anyone had any ideas of what I could make with it, other than using it for its usual purpose as a sarong. A fellow follower suggested making a 'pirate scarf'... that's right a pirate scarf, my thoughts exactly! 

I honestly don't think I could pull off the somewhat indie look but I feel a challenge worth attempting coming on. I suggested the style dare in a comment and in reply it was suggested that we take on this challenge for Sundays church wear?! Okay, so now it's not just a pirate scarf but I also have to sport it at church! I'm not going to use my new Batic fabric but I will take on the challenge. Anyone else up for it? 

Below are some examples of how a 'pirate scarf'is worn, for fashion not costume. 

On Sunday I will post my look and I'd love to see yours too! Post to Instagram and use #mamaessyfashiondare.

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I Quit Sugar :: Weeks 2 & 3

Okay, here I am finally with an update on my "I quit Sugar" detox. On Sunday just gone I completed week 3 and, my it was tough! Week 2 was still in the 'cutting back' phase and I was still allowed to eat sugar in very small doses but then week 3 came along and it was 'cold turkey' time. No fresh or dried fruit. No juice. No muesli or muesli bars. No jams. No condiments containing sugar eg. bbq and tomato sauce. No flavoured yogurts. No honey. No chocolate, soft drinks etc. And basically nothing with more than 6g sugar per 100g.

It was particularly tough because I had my parents and one of my brothers make a spontaneous visit to Darwin and, it gave me that holiday feeling. 'Holiday feelings' tend to come with celebratory food! I wanted to chill out with my family with chocolates, cake, lollies and a bottle of soft drink. Its what you do right?! I was strong enough to resist but I did make a few mistakes along the way.

In the [welcomed] chaos of having 3 extra people bunk in our 2 bedroom unit I ate a few fruit bars and didn't even realize till days later that I ate them - and wasn't supposed to. I also ate a bit of carrot which I later found out is high in fructose. Not really the kind of sugar I'm addicted to and need cutting back on but I did feel like I had let myself down a little. Oh and I've also had an issue with low milk supply (breastfeeding) so along with a herb called 'Fenugreek' (which by the way is a miracle worker for getting your supply back up!) I also took Sustagen which contains a fair bit of sugar. At this point I had to weigh up what was important and of course it was Samson's well-being. I contemplated whether there was even any point continuing the detox if I couldn't do it thoroughly?! I felt like I had failed what I so desperately wanted to achieve.

The two foods that have really helped me through my challenging moments have been natural yogurt with cinnamon and bacon and egg cupcakes. 

I came to the conclusion that surely it would still be better for me to continue even if I couldn't follow all the rules. The purpose for me doing the detox program was to break my addiction with 'sour worms' and 'chocolate coated licorice', and to replace them with healthier snacks. Although I've made 'Sustagen' the exception I have been keeping to the rules of the detox and I am feeling proud about that.  I will no doubt do the detox again somewhere down the track.

Something else that has also been challenging is peoples negative responses to others wanting to live a healthier lifestyle. I've discovered that there are some narrow-minded and condescending people who think its ridiculous to cut back on sugar. I don't believe I've pushed my 'detox' ways on others, and other then here on my blog I don't tend to talk much about it, or at least not in a way that should make others feel bad about their own eating habits. So its been very frustrating that people will try and bring you down with negative comments, which anyway reads to me that they need to make you look bad in order for them to make themselves feel/look better. I am part way into week 4 and I shall not be moved by negativity!

Pen Friends, Where Are They Now?

Yesterday I found myself thinking about the pen friends I used to correspond with via good old 'snail mail'. I wrote to friends who lived only 20 minutes away and then there were friends who lived far away and, I loved writing to each one of them. At what point did I stop sending and receiving letters? What happened? Was there a letter lost in the post, did someone move address, did we lose interest in writing, did busy lives, study and jobs get in the way or, was it technology?

When I moved to Darwin I remember writing to my nanna but sadly she has since passed away. Grandparents are great people to write letters to. Its what they know and its what they did in their day. But I've entered a stage in my life where close relatives are slowly quickly passing away. I've already lost two grandparents in 12 months - but that's for another post. Like our elderly, handwritten letters are fading too. The only other person I currently write to is our sponsor child. 

There's an element of mystery when you write to a friend who you may have only met in the flesh once or twice, and the reason you met was because you were both at the same place for a common reason or interest, a mutual friend even. You know that you both have at least one thing in common. Through each letter received and written there's an unfolding of a special friendship and you're learning about that person with anticipation. 

Today, we seem to stalk for friends on Facebook and hit the 'add friend' button in hope you'll be granted 'instant' friendship. You then scour their profile in attempt discover who they are, photo by photo, status by status, you 'instantly' make up you're own judgement of that person and, who you think they are based on what they have posted. Obviously I do believe a profile says a lot about a person but its all surface knowledge, it's not a close friendship its an acquaintance who we met once and then proceeded to add them on Facebook... to never have another proper conversation with! 

Okay, so maybe some of you use Facebook chat but how often do you chat online with someone you only met once with? Do you get what I'm saying? Friendship on Facebook just isn't deep or intimate enough if you're really wanting to get to know someone and form a close friendship with. 

Social media is merely a stepping stone to close friendship. Other efforts need to be made. That's right, I just said 'effort'. It's too easy to be a Facebook friend, its clicking buttons at your fingertips every so often. A 'like' here and a 'like' there, maybe a comment even.

If there's one thing I've learnt its that friendships require building on and effort (effort you want to put in). Its taking initiative, its making a call, arranging a coffee date, its a meal at your home (which I fail miserably to do) and maybe its a personal handwritten letter. It's making sure you water the seed that was planted so that it grows beautiful and strong. 

I'm feeling like this post is starting to sway from 'writing letters' and turning into a rant about Facebook (which you can read here) but what I'm trying to get across is this:

I miss taking the time to write a letter to a friend. I miss building a friendship through letters and than eagerly looking forward to the day we meet again in person. I miss writing a letter to someone who lives in the same city but who I don't see often. The 21st century is in great need of quality time!

I Quit Sugar :: Week 1

As you may already know from a previous post which you can read about here, hubby and I have begun Sarah Wilson's 8 week sugar detox program. I'll just mention that we are doing the program by following her book "I quit Sugar", not via her online program which is also available. You can purchase her book for $25 from Big W if you are interested in giving it a go.

Now I bet you're all wondering how I'm going after my first week (which ended on Monday) of starting the program? It's been surprisingly easy but also challenging. 

What I learnt about sugar this week: 

"its fructose that's the enemy, not sugar, per se". Some of the things that fructose does to are bodies are that it can raise our anxiety levels, mess with fertility and, it makes it harder for our immune system to fight off viruses and infections.

What I changed: 

Although the program doesn't ask you to go cold turkey in the first couple of weeks I did decide to cut out all lollies and chocolate bars. We also stopped having muesli and cut out white breads, rice and pastas and swapped them for brown/wholemeal types.

New ingredients I introduced:

I stocked up on more nuts and bought coconut oil which is one of the 'staple' ingredients for a lot of the sugar-free recipes.

New recipes I tried:

I didn't really get into any of the recipes this week beside introducing eggs and avocado on toast for lunches. Our dinners are already mostly wholesome and healthy. Its the snacks I need sugar-free substitutes for.

What challenged me:

We went to a friends 80's birthday party and I had to resist some very yummy foods including the most delicious and amazing cake you've ever seen! I did have some white bread though. 

The other challenge was going to the supermarket and noticing all the delicious foods such as donuts and alike! 

Fitness:

A few days before starting the program I had started working out but, by the time I had gotten a few days into the detox I started to notice a significant decrease in my milk supply (still exclusively breastfeeding Samson). While I don't think the drop was solely caused by daily 30 min workouts, I do think it contributed. I have been working hard at increasing my supply and won't continue work outs until I feel it has stabilized. 

Not Fake, Choosing the Positives

I recently read this article on iVillage and it prompted me to write about why I don't post all the bad bits. I read through the comments that others posted on the article and they were mostly negative toward the writer. I'm not quite sure why it was even titled "Why I fake it on Facebook" because from what I read it just sounded like this mum only shared the good bits, and avoided posting the negative bits.

Well, I'm the same and I agree with this mum [writer]. I don't post all the 'bad' bits either. Nobody needs to know that I forgot to change a nappy before putting bubs to bed or that my 18 mo still can't say 8 words like the charts/stats say he should, or that I've had the same load of washing in the machine for 3 days now!  I know I'm not the perfect mother but I already know that I'm a wonderful mum trying to do my best! That's what we're all doing, right? Doing our utmost best for our children who we love dearly. And if I never saw a negative post from a mum on Facebook I don't assume she's perfect or that shes never served up a Vegemite sandwich for dinner. I think she's just another great mum powering on in her role as mother and that she chose to see and post the good above the bad! 

When I do have bad days I usually make a call or shoot a text to a close friend who's also a mother. Another mum who totally gets that you're in tears because you've been up all night with a baby and you've just yelled at your toddler for - you're not sure what! She's had those days and moments too. 

Why set myself up for judgment and negative criticism by posting to the world! Or why should I post in hope that I'll attract enough attention for people to tell me how good a mother I am and, so that I get a bunch of people sending me messages asking me if I'm alright or need something. But most of the time I don't want or need someone to rescue me I just need an understanding ear. If I'm not alright and I want to talk about it then I should initiate that.  

The [not so secret] truth is, that being a parent is damn hard sometimes! And just today I've had a rough morning! I've got two sick babies who are also out of whack because they both had immunizations on Friday and, I am so tired and sleep deprived because my normally sleeping baby wants my attention at 2 hr intervals! Whilst hanging out the washing that had been in the machine since Monday, Rupert got filthy dirty playing with the pot plants, and in my attempt to wash him in the shower he also peed on the bathroom floor and proceeded to walk through it with his dirty feet. That's just part of my morning. It's also just all normal everyday kid stuff but on those off days it all seems bigger then Ben Hur! 

I am not a perfect mother but I try to choose the positive route. I don't want my facebook page to be a whinge-fest just to prove I'm human. All us mums already know what it's really like behind closed doors anyway. We know non of us have it all together, even if it appeared that way. 

I'm honest about my imperfections with others and I love learning from other mums too. Social media just isn't always the right place for it on a continuous or regular basis. 

So whilst I've just shared about my mundane rough morning as a mum (which I will not be posting to facebook) I also want to share my positive 'tidbit' from today. The picture you see at the top of this post, are wooden play eggs lined up on the tv cabinet. I was so delighted when I turned my head from the laptop to hear and see my Rupert bear counting (in baby lingo) as he placed halved eggs side by side. It was both cute and clever. This is the 'bit' I choose to dwell on and remember.

Fun from the 80's!

My dear friend Nicole recently turned 30 and to celebrate her birthday she hosted an 80's themed party! Yes, the radical, bright, eccentric, faddy decade of the 1980's. I was born in 1989 so I can't really say I've experienced the culture but, I do know that it was quite a memorable decade for many and even those who've lived through it have expressed their bewilderment for the fashion that was born. As I chatted with a [middle aged] friend on the topic, I learnt that it was all about being 'loud' and 'casual' didn't really have a place. It was an eccentric period in time where clothing said it all! 

Now, I didn't do much research but with little digging I discovered that people in the 80's posed for photos in the most unusual ways. When I pose for a photo today its about smiling, looking nice and like you're having an enjoyable time but, for those in the 80's it seemed they were all making a statement. I got the impression that everyone did aerobics with Olivia Newton John  or that the girls had swallowed a bottle of glitter, causing an unnecessary amount of froufrou and tacky glam! What were they thinking?!

So onto my outfit, what did I wear? This scares me a little because I didn't spend a cent on my costume. Either the 80's was back in fashion or I was way out of fashion! 

I wore a pair of floral jeans that I bought brand new only a few months ago and, a top that I bought over a year ago but love it so much I wear it to death. This top is my go-to everyday any day kind of top. It was roomy enough to take me through two pregnancies and practical for breastfeeding and looked great paired with denim shorts. But having now worn it with my floral jeans I feel like I have committed a huge fashion crime! 

My shoes were hot pink chucks (Which seemed to have stayed in fashion for years!), earrings were from an 80's hens party from a few years back, pearl necklace and bangles were items pulled from my everyday accessories stash  and, my silver handbag is a bag I've been using on a daily basis since I bought it a few months ago! And well, it wasn't the 80's without big hair so I pulled out my trusty crimping iron and tied part of it up into a very dorky do. 

My makeup was probably a little underwhelming for the 80's but I did the best I could with the colours I could find in my make up kit. I used pastel purple, pink and yellow for my eyes, heavily applied blusher and the brightest pink lipstick I owned.

Having arrived at the party it felt as though I had walked into a crazy period of time! Everywhere I looked there was big hair, dorky side ponies, guys in tight short shorts, girls with heavily applied makeup, guys with creepy mullets and mustaches and just way too many bright colours! Everyone truly looked great crazy in their outfits. 

IT WAS SUCH A FUN NIGHT, and as dorky and bogan I think the 80's to be, I think I understand why the fashion took off. In my 80's attire among other 80's party goers I felt young, bright, bubbly, expressed, eccentric and fun! 

Thanks to the talents of my hubby here are a few pics of how I looked. To protect the privacy of others I haven't posted any photos from the party.

Why I'm Quitting Sugar

I grew up in a family of 'fit' people. My dad and Two of my three brothers seem to have metabolisms that never allow them to carry excess weight, even if they sat around eating hot chips and gravy all day! My other brother, sister and mum are all fit people too, but more of the realistic kind. Like me they work hard to keep fit. Mum dances, walks and does yoga, Jake will run 10 kms up a mountain and Bec has been involved with exercises of the more 'fun' kind like Zumba and spinning (maybe not so fun). Dad, Matthew (brother not hubby) and Samuel, well they are the cool kids who surf and do extreme sports like mountain bike riding down mt. Ousley. They lift weights because they don't have kilos to loose, only muscle to build.

And me, well before moving out of home 6 years ago I was fit too but I didn't work out and the only exercise I did was jogging or walking. But I did eat well and maintained a tiny waist. When I hit the 18-19 mark I noticed a change in my body. I started to fill out and I felt my metabolism slow down. I'd say this would be normal for females at that age. I also found it hard to keep fit and I've only dabbled in exercise like zumba, yoga, polercise, dancing and attending the gym. And although I've never increased a dress size and eat healthy meals I've become a huge sugar addict! In fact I've been a sugar addict since my teenage years, it just didn't seem to affect me as much then. I'm addicted to eating chocolate and lollies on an almost daily basis and its draining my energy and good health! My dad was also a sweet tooth but at nearly 65 years old he is a 'fit freak of nature'! 

My dad lives and breaths all things healthy, he still surfs and his body is ripped! I'm not sure I can even imagine my dad getting sick or ever dying, I'm convinced he'll live forever. 

Because dad lives such a healthy lifestyle its something he doesn't stop talking about or giving advice on. There is not a phone call where my dad doesn't ask me if I'm eating healthy and exercising regularly and, if my husband is also looking after his well-being. He even asks about what our kids are eating! There isn't a parcel I don't receive that doesn't contain health food magazines, protein foods or exercise equipment.

Some years back this really bothered me. I felt like I must have been fat or looking out of shape for my dad to be so full on with my eating habits and my exercise regime. I would say that I probably resented him a little because of it. I knew I wasn't overweight but why was he so concerned? Don't all men know that the way to make a girl feel like crap is to talk about her weight and health?!

Well, I've grown up and matured a little and can see that dad isn't trying to make me feel self conscious about how I look (he thinks his daughter is gorgeous after all) but he is trying to teach me to be conscious about my health and eating habits. He too knows what its like to crave sugar and whilst I think he doesn't have to work hard to be fit, he would tell me otherwise. It is hard work and it does take motivating, mentoring and commitment. 

I am 24. I am female. I am curvy... and I love my body! I'm not into recreating my figure, I like it and I can appreciate that God has created us all to be different and, beautiful in our own way. We're not all meant to be tall, thin dark haired beauties! But of course if I could have designed my own body shape than I'd probably change a few things, that's the 'human' in me. 

I'm not quitting sugar because I need to loose weight specifically, I'm quitting sugar because I want to be healthier, fitter and more energized. I also want to tone up and build strength so, I'm committing to just 30 mins of exercise each day.

So what am I doing exactly? I'm following Sarah Willson's "I Quit Sugar" 8 week detox program.

"Sarah's down-to-earth, practical approach

 makes the sugar-quitting process doable, 

while her recipes make it fun."

David Gillespie author of Sweet Poison and Big Fat Lies

So far, I can say that it's a great book and easy to follow. It doesn't have a 'cold turkey' approach and its not a fancy overdressed or overwhelming program. It really is down to earth. I know a few people who have done the program and they only have good things to say about it. 

Matt has decided to do the detox program also. He unlike me isn't a sugar addict but he does want to be healthier and, lose weight in order to reveal his hidden six pack. The program also helps with weight loss.
We've taken a picture of our current (soon to be before) bodies and recorded our weight and measurements. We intend to update with healthier and fitter stats!

Cravings are hard to overcome and exercise is hard to commit to so I'm blogging my way through the program to help me stay focused and motivated. And knowing there are a bunch of people reading this makes me determined to not fail. You all may think you are doing nothing to help me but in fact you are silently motivating me!

And... just a shout out to me friend Emma! I don't know what it is because your health spamming should really annoy me, but you've inspired me. Maybe its our similar body shapes, or that we used to 'pig out' on sour warheads and sour straps together?! hehe

Date Night Planning

In a recent post last week I wrote about the new found importance of dating my husband continuously for our entire married lives. 
We've decided to have weekly date nights to help us be more deliberate about spending quality time together. Quality time that doesn't consist of constant facebook checking, email and blog writing, instagram posting, news reading and or TV watching! There's something very refreshing about spending time together where our minds aren't constantly buzzing with media 'noise'.  Oh, and without the noise of precious little ones. 

We've chosen Monday nights to be our date night. It's often the day I don't take the boys out for any activities; it’s our home day after coming off of a busy weekend. It’s also the day Matt takes the car to work which means no drop off and pick up for me. I can spend the afternoon preparing a nice meal for Matt and I and make sure Rupert has dinner that bit early so that Matt and I can eat alone. 

It’s really quite simple having a date night. Babies fed and in bed. TV turned off. Phones and ipads out of reach. Nice dinner prepared. And an activity if we so wish. 

Although nice, date nights don't have to be an expensive fine dining experience or a movie on the big screen. It can be done in the comfort of your own home. 

Last week we had a baked dinner with a glass of wine and played a few games of chess. Monday night just gone we again had a nice dinner with wine and did a puzzle together. We didn't get to finish the puzzle - its 1000 pieces! 

Here is what we've got planned for our date nights in the month of August. It's simple and achievable.

5th - 1000 pc Puzzle

12th - Make sushi together. Something neither of us have done.

19th - Watch a movie "Star Trek Into Darkness" (see what a good wife I am :-P)
26th - Zumba workout

50 Things About Me

1. Dated Matt for 13 months.
2. Engaged for 14 months.
3. Married for nearly 4 years.
4. I have 2 sons Rupert and Samson, born 14 months apart.
5. Purchased our first house in early 2013.
6. My favourite colour is red.
7. I once had my hair cut to replicate that of Julie Andrews in the sound of music. Biggest hair fail!
8. Mother by occupation.
9. Law school dropout.
10. Seamstress by trade.
11. Vomited on my first date with Matt.
12. I love chocolate.
13. I think blonde is sexy, brunette sophisticated and I can never decide which I prefer to be?
14. I have 4 siblings and 7 niblings.
15. Retro is my style.
16. Vintage my love.
17. I like wearing lacey nanna nickers.
18. I have a scar on my shoulder from a scooter accident which gets mistaken for a hicky.
19. My favourite flower is the tulip.
20. I dislike tardiness.
21. I’m not often seen without wearing makeup.
22. As a little child I was extremely shy, people wondered if I could actually talk!
23. I dislike being called 'Jess'!
24. I was homeschooled after year 4.
25. I would love to raise a big family!
26. A white lone hair grows on my shoulder; I call it my ‘lucky’ hair!
27. My maid of honour pulled out my 1 ½ inch long ‘lucky’ hair on my wedding day! It grew back.
28. I only like to drink hot beverages from a teacup.
29. I love opera.
30. When I was a teenager I wanted to become an opera singer.
31. I can’t sing!
32. My husband is a very talented muso.
33. I’m a crazy dancer.
34. I like wearing red lipstick.
35. I threw cupcakes at my wedding.
36. My jewellery style is ‘art deco’.
37. I love all things crafty such as knitting, crocheting, sewing, quilting and random DIY projects.
38. I dislike scrapbooking but do it occasionally.
39. I like dressing up.
40. I would like to do some maternity modelling.
41. I don’t like printed t-shirts
42. It’s not Christmas without a homemade pavlova.
43. I like walnut stained furniture.
44. My dad buys me a new watch every Christmas.
45. My favourite book is “The Cat of Bubastes” by G A Henty.
46. I learnt to play piano and the trumpet.
47. My most desired appliance is a red KitchenAid stand mixer.
48. I’m a big Tupperware fan.
49. I like watching period dramas.
50. I like spicy food. 

Fall in Love Again and Again...

One baby is okay, very manageable but 2 babies well that's a juggle. You are feeding one baby and hubby is wrangling the other baby who seems to have more energy than would be considered normal! You no longer hold hands with your sweetheart because someone is pushing the pram, holding the newborn or walking the child with ants in his pants.

When hubby gets home from work, it’s a passing kiss, quick hug and a sneaky pinch on the bum. It’s back to the stove where you've been cooking that Ossobuco for 3 hours, but surely it’s got to be done already!  You try to speed the process up cos it’s got to be on that Bunnykins plate asap and then has to be put in the freezer for a 1 min to cool. There are tiny fingers waiting anxiously for his dinner and it doesn't matter how many times you say the word "patience", he just aint getting it. So, out of the freezer and onto the table, we try and say grace as a family but we must keep one eye open for the little Bunnykins fork that is nearly poking us in the eye. Seriously, how do you teach a 16 month old patience! We chow down dinner and by now it’s nearing 6:30pm and that's a good thing. Rupert takes a book from the shelf and hops onto daddy's knee for his bedtime story in the bedroom. Daddy reads him the same book he chose the night before, and the night before that and… the night before that! But that's okay, daddy doesn't even need to read, he knows this book off by heart. Into bed, lights out and we're one down one more to go! A quick tidy up in the play room oops sorry no, that's actually our lounge and dinning but only takes a few minutes and we can see that.

Life is certainly fuller with children, it’s challenging, rewarding, tiring, fascinating and exciting and, whilst you may miss the good old days before babies, you never seem to regret having them.

The stats say that the divorce rate in mature age couples is rising. Parents have invested so much love and time into their children (not a bad thing) that once they're no longer living at home they discover their marriage to be somewhat estranged. Life has been so full and busy with raising children that they forgot to continue growing their relationship and friendship.

Matt and I haven't even been parents for 2 years and we already understand these stats. We have a good loving and committed relationship but we don't 'date' anymore. Holding the title of husband and wife and mother and father, we seem to think we're qualified for eternal love and happiness. Not so.

I believe in falling in love with just 'one' person but I also believe you need to fall in love with that person many times over.

 I fell head over heels for Matt when we were dating and it’s for that reason I wanted to know more about him. It’s called dating. But why is it that after marriage we no longer see the need to date and continue to get to know each other? After all we're still individuals and we are still growing and changing.

I am a wife before I'm a mother! My husband comes before my children and when my relationship with Matt is being nurtured and growing strong it allows us to be good parents. We can then be good examples of love and commitment to our sons.

When Matt and I were dating I asked him what his favourite food was, his answer was "donuts". A few years passed and I asked him again, the answer was still "donuts"! But then I asked him just a few days ago and his answer was no longer the same, his favourite food had changed. My husband’s favourite food was now "hot chips"(of all things)! If I had not asked I would have assumed donuts to be his favourite for many more years to come.

 I want to know my husband both through his unchanging habits and through his changing likes.

So, we've decided to date again! We're introducing date nights. A concept not unfamiliar to many of you but for us it is new. With the birth of Rupert we didn't seem to feel the need but when Samson came along we began to feel the stretch of marriage, it subtly becomes all about bedtime stories, dirty nappies, baby babel and milestones. But when there are no more dirty nappies and you no longer have little children to read bedtime stories to, what will we do with ourselves? We must start now. We must engage in each other’s interests together. We must continuously date and fall in love so that when we are old we can show that we weren't just committed by law but that we have always loved as husband and wife should.

We shall never fall out of love but we will constantly try to fall in love again and again.

As it’s a new month I have started to write up a date night planner.  We have chosen Monday nights to be our “date night” and as we intend to have our date nights at home because it is logistically and financially easier, we are having to be a little creative. But this is for another post. Stay tuned.

on one of our dates back in 2007 just weeks after the Darwin Show ordeal.

Trips to the Show

Yesterday we took a family outing to the Royal Darwin Show. It was my third time going to the small country like show and it always brings back some funny memories. 

My first visit to the show was also my first date with Matt but I'll come back to that story in a bit. The second time we went to the show was the year I was pregnant with Rupert. I can recall Matt and I talking about how much more exciting it would be when we could bring our kids to the show. The dirty pens with ugly farm animals, the ginormous pumpkins, and the cheap worthless show bags would suddenly spark amazement in a small child's eyes. Well, two babies later we made our third trip to the show as parents but, before I tell you about how yesterday went let’s rewind back six years to 2007, my first visit to the Darwin Show.

In February 2007 I moved to Darwin and shortly afterwards met Matt through church and Uni events. We became friends. By about June/July our 'friendship' started to spark and before I knew it Matt was driving me to the Royal Darwin Show. 

I was feeling pretty good about this 'outing' to the show together and I made sure I was looking my best. I wore my long flowing hair out and had even purchased a new white top to wear. Little did I know about how much of a dust bowl this Darwin Show was, I was to soon find out it didn't even compare to the Sydney Royal Easter Show!

Back then I liked rides so, we bought some drinks and the adventure began. No food and one bottle of coke down we took to our third ride known as the 'Hurricane'. Big mistake! 

My mobile phone flew out of my bag, hitting Matt's head on its way to Timbuktu. I then began to feel very dizzy and light headed that I was soon leaning on Matt and could not compose myself. Matt was probably feeling a little bewildered by my sudden affection that had him squished to the side of the cart. Affection was not the intention, I felt as though I was dying and eventually I couldn't hold it in any longer. I vomited. And much vomit I vomited. As the Hurricane is still spinning in full motion my failed attempt to vomit over the outside of the cart resulted in the vomit flying back smack into my face, through my lovely long hair (that I wore out), onto my nice new white top, down my jeans and only just missing the people in the cart behind us! A lost phone, vomit all over me and barely able to walk, this was not going well. We headed for the toilets to get cleaned up but it got worse, we bumped into some friends of Matt's and with a face plastered in vomit I was introduced to them as his friend. Not cool and I've never been on another ride since!

Anyway we dated, became engaged and are now married; it didn't turn out too badly in the end. 

So, back to yesterdays visit to the show. It wasn't quite as great as I expected it to be, it seemed that Rupert was still just that bit too young to appreciate the animals and performances. He was fascinated at times and he did get to pat a baby chicken but was otherwise mostly restless and unhappy being stuck in the stroller. And when we had him out of the stroller he wanted to run among the crowds. It was was nice to be out on a family outing nonetheless and, we did get to enter some worthwhile competitions... fingers crossed!

Till next time... J x

Nanna - at My Age - in Her Day

It's been a little while since my last post and I was wondering what to blog about but, after a party we attended last night I was inspired to write about it. 

One of my dearest friends Siobhan whom I like to refer to as my 'sister-friend' (she's also my brother in-laws girlfriend) recently turned 21 and hosted a “Vintage Old Hollywood Glamour” party last night.

We were informed to dress for the occasion, encouraged to dress to the nines with no holding back! I may not have had to spend a cent on props for my costume and look but I did my best to look authentic of the glamorous bygone days of  the 1950's. 

The birthday girl and I.

As I did my hair up in pin curls yesterday morning, my thoughts strayed to my Nanna Bamford and what it was like for her - at my age - in her day! What did she do to prep for a fancy night out? Did she pin curl her hair too? What length would her dress have been and did she slip on a pair of elbow length gloves? My Nanna Kartawidjaja also comes to mind. It’s been said that I look a lot like her when she was young so, I've been turning the unit upside down desperately trying to find a small USB containing black and white photos of my grandparents when they were young, back in the 1940 - 1950's. I've had no success finding it so unfortunately I can't share them with you. I will however, share some photos of last night’s party.

So, here's how I got my look. 

In the morning I washed my hair and put it up in pin curls whilst still damp. If you've never pin curled before you can find out how here. It requires many bobby pins or flat prong clips and is a little fiddly but not too difficult. The brush out is the scariest part but also the easiest and, depending on how you brush the curls depends on the look you get.

In the afternoon when both boys were snoozing, I decided to put on my makeup. Doing make up isn't something I find difficult but using liquid eyeliner however, is quite the challenge! I generally only wear pencil eyeliner on the top inside of my eyelid, it gives subtle definition without looking heavy or making my eyes look smaller. But for those more special and fancy occasions I do bring out the liquid and, what I find best and easiest to use is Maybelline Master Precise Liquid Liner. It's more of a pen rather than a brush you have to dip in liquid. You'll all probably agree that the hardest part is getting that flick right so here's a good tutorial on 1950's make up which not only demonstrates the eye makeup but on getting the complete look..

Rupert taking on the role of photo bomber.

Now for the dress. It's not a dress that I've been overly fond of but I think I bought it for about $50 from "Noni B" when I was working there a few years back. I wore it to a friends wedding. It turned out to be perfect for last night’s occasion. The hemline sits at the traditional 1950's mid calf length, before dresses started to crop up to the knee. 

The heels were from "Forever New", bought for a wedding last year. They are what I'd call a 1950's "Spectator" style shoe/heel. They have a white toe so I thought I'd wear white elbow length gloves to tie it all together. The gloves used to belong to my grandmother, a little bit of special. 

I wanted my hair and makeup to be the outstanding feature of my look so I tried not to overdo it with accessories or by adding too many accents and colours. 

In my hair I placed an all-black flower and a simple but stunning necklace around my neck. I payed $4 for it from "Collete Hayman", it too was bought for a previous wedding. Around my waist was a thin black belt with a small silver buckle which tied in with the necklace.

So that was my look now, let’s talk party. When I get invited to fancy dress parties with a theme I often wonder how "themed" they will actually be. You kind of don't want to go all out if the host and others are only partly rising to the occasion but, knowing this birthday girl quite well, I knew it would be great! And if none of the other attendees were going all out she most certainly would be! 

The venue far exceeded my expectations! I'm not sure what I expected really?! I expected guests to be dressed in vintage glamour but never gave much thought to how the venue would look. Well, it looked amazing! As you entered the back yard through the carport you walked a red carpet that glowed with a row of tea lights either side and, when you got to the back yard it had been transformed into a stunning vintage styled restaurant/bar/club. There were small cafe tables set up with these simple but ever so effective table centers.  There were bench seats with with fairy lights draping from the trees and if it weren't for the Hollywood sign on the back fence, I'd say it felt a lot like Paris When it Sizzles! The music playing was iconic to the era and glancing around the yard to the back of the house there sat a screen playing "Breakfast at Tiffany's". I could have sworn it felt like I was sitting in a romantic restaurant with Audrey Hepburn across the table. 

The food was delicious and the guests looked vintage and glamorous.

Siobhan and Stuart (Matt's brother)

The birthday girl and also the star of the night looked stunningly gorgeous! Siobhan sported a very glamorous vintage dress which, by the way, she purchased from a vintage store in Germany! Can't get much more authentic than that! I didn't examine it but it looked like red shot taffeta or satin with a beautiful black lace overlay which sparkled with black sequins. Siobhan’s hair was very sleek and very 1950’s; it had an element of Dita von Teese. She wore sweet pearls around her neck (maybe there’s a story behind those?) and shiny black elbow length gloves with an eye-catching diamante bracelet. Her shoes were black peep toes. She looked incredible!

There were some lovely speeches and a video taking us through Siobhan’s 21 years on earth... and then... we hit the expiry time. That time when little babies are crying, falling over, getting irritable and well, ready for bed!

A lovely night had.   

Once a Month Cooking

When we had Rupert the three of us spent 5 days in hospital with delicious meals brought to my bedside each day. But when it was time to leave and bring our little one home and Matty was to return to work, reality set in and, I didn't know how on earth I would manage cooking as well as being a new mum! Somehow the thought of cooking was one that was very overwhelming. 

We were so grateful for our church family who cooked us yummy meals which kept coming for about 2 weeks... so very blessed.

This time round I decided to plan ahead. I spent a weekend cooking meal after meal and it was the best thing I could have done. Samson is over 2 weeks old and I still haven't had the need to cook. I cooked enough to cover us for about a month. Although I certainly feel that I would be capable of cooking if had to (definitely not as overwhelming second time round), its just nice to not have to worry in these early weeks. 

The idea of 'once a month' cooking and meal planning has worked so well that I think I might do it on a regular basis, not every month but possibly every second month.

On my weekend of cooking I created a very delicious and easy recipe for 'Honey Mustard Drumsticks' - thats what you do when you haven't got the 'Chicken Tonight' jar in your cupboard. Hehe.

Honey Mustard Drumsticks Author Mama Essy (Jessica Kartawidjaja-Fong)

Ingredients

8-10 chicken drumsticks

1 1/2 tbl Whole grain mustard

1 tbl Dijon mustard

1 tbl white vinegar

2 tsp mixed herbs

1/4 cup honey

Method

Combine all ingredients together. Mix well and pour over drumsticks. Bake in a glass baking dish until cooked through (I think it took about 40-50 mins in our oven).

Tip: make marinade ahead of time, place in a bag with drumsticks, mix through and store in the fridge for 2 hours before baking.

Our Newest Addition

Well its been a little while since my last post so I thought I better not delay any longer and give you all a quick update. If you've liked my Facebook Page you're probably already up to date with my regular happenings.

I actually started writing this post a few days ago and was going to give a slightly more detailed post on the pregnancy and birth of our newest addition. However, I've since felt that its okay to not disclose 'everything'. To be honest, giving birth is something I know to be very traumatic and, that doesn't mean I've had terrible birthing experiences, its actually quite the opposite. I consider both of my babies births to have been very smooth but, there's something about the experience that makes me want to shudder at the very thought. And just thinking about it makes me almost cry to remember the pain and hardship that natural childbirth is. Both my pregnancies had its challenges and hurdles to overcome but, I am thankful that nothing is too big for my God. He has shone His grace and mercies through the skills of my obstrician and midwives.

So now I will introduce to you... Samson Brian! 

Born via natural birth with no drugs on Tuesday 30th April 2013 at 12:20pm. Weighing 3.08kg and 48cm long. He is our little olive skinned baby with almost black hair and dark brown eyes. He is perfect in every way, not that I would expect any less from a creator who sends us everything good and perfect! And not always what we might consider perfect but what he gives us to show us what it is to be perfect in the eyes of God. I say this because I'm aware that there are parents out their who's babes may have been born with a condition that challenges them and, may think that its well and good for me to say how perfect my healthy child is and that I don't know what it is to see them suffer. I don't know. But I know that whatever challenges are put in my/our path, are there to strengthen my character and trust in God.

Our little family is most grateful to God for blessing us with another son and brother for Rupert. 

40 weeks

1 day old

Samson's 1st bath