I Quit Sugar :: Weeks 2 & 3

Okay, here I am finally with an update on my "I quit Sugar" detox. On Sunday just gone I completed week 3 and, my it was tough! Week 2 was still in the 'cutting back' phase and I was still allowed to eat sugar in very small doses but then week 3 came along and it was 'cold turkey' time. No fresh or dried fruit. No juice. No muesli or muesli bars. No jams. No condiments containing sugar eg. bbq and tomato sauce. No flavoured yogurts. No honey. No chocolate, soft drinks etc. And basically nothing with more than 6g sugar per 100g.

It was particularly tough because I had my parents and one of my brothers make a spontaneous visit to Darwin and, it gave me that holiday feeling. 'Holiday feelings' tend to come with celebratory food! I wanted to chill out with my family with chocolates, cake, lollies and a bottle of soft drink. Its what you do right?! I was strong enough to resist but I did make a few mistakes along the way.

In the [welcomed] chaos of having 3 extra people bunk in our 2 bedroom unit I ate a few fruit bars and didn't even realize till days later that I ate them - and wasn't supposed to. I also ate a bit of carrot which I later found out is high in fructose. Not really the kind of sugar I'm addicted to and need cutting back on but I did feel like I had let myself down a little. Oh and I've also had an issue with low milk supply (breastfeeding) so along with a herb called 'Fenugreek' (which by the way is a miracle worker for getting your supply back up!) I also took Sustagen which contains a fair bit of sugar. At this point I had to weigh up what was important and of course it was Samson's well-being. I contemplated whether there was even any point continuing the detox if I couldn't do it thoroughly?! I felt like I had failed what I so desperately wanted to achieve.

The two foods that have really helped me through my challenging moments have been natural yogurt with cinnamon and bacon and egg cupcakes. 

I came to the conclusion that surely it would still be better for me to continue even if I couldn't follow all the rules. The purpose for me doing the detox program was to break my addiction with 'sour worms' and 'chocolate coated licorice', and to replace them with healthier snacks. Although I've made 'Sustagen' the exception I have been keeping to the rules of the detox and I am feeling proud about that.  I will no doubt do the detox again somewhere down the track.

Something else that has also been challenging is peoples negative responses to others wanting to live a healthier lifestyle. I've discovered that there are some narrow-minded and condescending people who think its ridiculous to cut back on sugar. I don't believe I've pushed my 'detox' ways on others, and other then here on my blog I don't tend to talk much about it, or at least not in a way that should make others feel bad about their own eating habits. So its been very frustrating that people will try and bring you down with negative comments, which anyway reads to me that they need to make you look bad in order for them to make themselves feel/look better. I am part way into week 4 and I shall not be moved by negativity!

Pen Friends, Where Are They Now?

Yesterday I found myself thinking about the pen friends I used to correspond with via good old 'snail mail'. I wrote to friends who lived only 20 minutes away and then there were friends who lived far away and, I loved writing to each one of them. At what point did I stop sending and receiving letters? What happened? Was there a letter lost in the post, did someone move address, did we lose interest in writing, did busy lives, study and jobs get in the way or, was it technology?

When I moved to Darwin I remember writing to my nanna but sadly she has since passed away. Grandparents are great people to write letters to. Its what they know and its what they did in their day. But I've entered a stage in my life where close relatives are slowly quickly passing away. I've already lost two grandparents in 12 months - but that's for another post. Like our elderly, handwritten letters are fading too. The only other person I currently write to is our sponsor child. 

There's an element of mystery when you write to a friend who you may have only met in the flesh once or twice, and the reason you met was because you were both at the same place for a common reason or interest, a mutual friend even. You know that you both have at least one thing in common. Through each letter received and written there's an unfolding of a special friendship and you're learning about that person with anticipation. 

Today, we seem to stalk for friends on Facebook and hit the 'add friend' button in hope you'll be granted 'instant' friendship. You then scour their profile in attempt discover who they are, photo by photo, status by status, you 'instantly' make up you're own judgement of that person and, who you think they are based on what they have posted. Obviously I do believe a profile says a lot about a person but its all surface knowledge, it's not a close friendship its an acquaintance who we met once and then proceeded to add them on Facebook... to never have another proper conversation with! 

Okay, so maybe some of you use Facebook chat but how often do you chat online with someone you only met once with? Do you get what I'm saying? Friendship on Facebook just isn't deep or intimate enough if you're really wanting to get to know someone and form a close friendship with. 

Social media is merely a stepping stone to close friendship. Other efforts need to be made. That's right, I just said 'effort'. It's too easy to be a Facebook friend, its clicking buttons at your fingertips every so often. A 'like' here and a 'like' there, maybe a comment even.

If there's one thing I've learnt its that friendships require building on and effort (effort you want to put in). Its taking initiative, its making a call, arranging a coffee date, its a meal at your home (which I fail miserably to do) and maybe its a personal handwritten letter. It's making sure you water the seed that was planted so that it grows beautiful and strong. 

I'm feeling like this post is starting to sway from 'writing letters' and turning into a rant about Facebook (which you can read here) but what I'm trying to get across is this:

I miss taking the time to write a letter to a friend. I miss building a friendship through letters and than eagerly looking forward to the day we meet again in person. I miss writing a letter to someone who lives in the same city but who I don't see often. The 21st century is in great need of quality time!

I Quit Sugar :: Week 1

As you may already know from a previous post which you can read about here, hubby and I have begun Sarah Wilson's 8 week sugar detox program. I'll just mention that we are doing the program by following her book "I quit Sugar", not via her online program which is also available. You can purchase her book for $25 from Big W if you are interested in giving it a go.

Now I bet you're all wondering how I'm going after my first week (which ended on Monday) of starting the program? It's been surprisingly easy but also challenging. 

What I learnt about sugar this week: 

"its fructose that's the enemy, not sugar, per se". Some of the things that fructose does to are bodies are that it can raise our anxiety levels, mess with fertility and, it makes it harder for our immune system to fight off viruses and infections.

What I changed: 

Although the program doesn't ask you to go cold turkey in the first couple of weeks I did decide to cut out all lollies and chocolate bars. We also stopped having muesli and cut out white breads, rice and pastas and swapped them for brown/wholemeal types.

New ingredients I introduced:

I stocked up on more nuts and bought coconut oil which is one of the 'staple' ingredients for a lot of the sugar-free recipes.

New recipes I tried:

I didn't really get into any of the recipes this week beside introducing eggs and avocado on toast for lunches. Our dinners are already mostly wholesome and healthy. Its the snacks I need sugar-free substitutes for.

What challenged me:

We went to a friends 80's birthday party and I had to resist some very yummy foods including the most delicious and amazing cake you've ever seen! I did have some white bread though. 

The other challenge was going to the supermarket and noticing all the delicious foods such as donuts and alike! 

Fitness:

A few days before starting the program I had started working out but, by the time I had gotten a few days into the detox I started to notice a significant decrease in my milk supply (still exclusively breastfeeding Samson). While I don't think the drop was solely caused by daily 30 min workouts, I do think it contributed. I have been working hard at increasing my supply and won't continue work outs until I feel it has stabilized. 

Not Fake, Choosing the Positives

I recently read this article on iVillage and it prompted me to write about why I don't post all the bad bits. I read through the comments that others posted on the article and they were mostly negative toward the writer. I'm not quite sure why it was even titled "Why I fake it on Facebook" because from what I read it just sounded like this mum only shared the good bits, and avoided posting the negative bits.

Well, I'm the same and I agree with this mum [writer]. I don't post all the 'bad' bits either. Nobody needs to know that I forgot to change a nappy before putting bubs to bed or that my 18 mo still can't say 8 words like the charts/stats say he should, or that I've had the same load of washing in the machine for 3 days now!  I know I'm not the perfect mother but I already know that I'm a wonderful mum trying to do my best! That's what we're all doing, right? Doing our utmost best for our children who we love dearly. And if I never saw a negative post from a mum on Facebook I don't assume she's perfect or that shes never served up a Vegemite sandwich for dinner. I think she's just another great mum powering on in her role as mother and that she chose to see and post the good above the bad! 

When I do have bad days I usually make a call or shoot a text to a close friend who's also a mother. Another mum who totally gets that you're in tears because you've been up all night with a baby and you've just yelled at your toddler for - you're not sure what! She's had those days and moments too. 

Why set myself up for judgment and negative criticism by posting to the world! Or why should I post in hope that I'll attract enough attention for people to tell me how good a mother I am and, so that I get a bunch of people sending me messages asking me if I'm alright or need something. But most of the time I don't want or need someone to rescue me I just need an understanding ear. If I'm not alright and I want to talk about it then I should initiate that.  

The [not so secret] truth is, that being a parent is damn hard sometimes! And just today I've had a rough morning! I've got two sick babies who are also out of whack because they both had immunizations on Friday and, I am so tired and sleep deprived because my normally sleeping baby wants my attention at 2 hr intervals! Whilst hanging out the washing that had been in the machine since Monday, Rupert got filthy dirty playing with the pot plants, and in my attempt to wash him in the shower he also peed on the bathroom floor and proceeded to walk through it with his dirty feet. That's just part of my morning. It's also just all normal everyday kid stuff but on those off days it all seems bigger then Ben Hur! 

I am not a perfect mother but I try to choose the positive route. I don't want my facebook page to be a whinge-fest just to prove I'm human. All us mums already know what it's really like behind closed doors anyway. We know non of us have it all together, even if it appeared that way. 

I'm honest about my imperfections with others and I love learning from other mums too. Social media just isn't always the right place for it on a continuous or regular basis. 

So whilst I've just shared about my mundane rough morning as a mum (which I will not be posting to facebook) I also want to share my positive 'tidbit' from today. The picture you see at the top of this post, are wooden play eggs lined up on the tv cabinet. I was so delighted when I turned my head from the laptop to hear and see my Rupert bear counting (in baby lingo) as he placed halved eggs side by side. It was both cute and clever. This is the 'bit' I choose to dwell on and remember.

Fun from the 80's!

My dear friend Nicole recently turned 30 and to celebrate her birthday she hosted an 80's themed party! Yes, the radical, bright, eccentric, faddy decade of the 1980's. I was born in 1989 so I can't really say I've experienced the culture but, I do know that it was quite a memorable decade for many and even those who've lived through it have expressed their bewilderment for the fashion that was born. As I chatted with a [middle aged] friend on the topic, I learnt that it was all about being 'loud' and 'casual' didn't really have a place. It was an eccentric period in time where clothing said it all! 

Now, I didn't do much research but with little digging I discovered that people in the 80's posed for photos in the most unusual ways. When I pose for a photo today its about smiling, looking nice and like you're having an enjoyable time but, for those in the 80's it seemed they were all making a statement. I got the impression that everyone did aerobics with Olivia Newton John  or that the girls had swallowed a bottle of glitter, causing an unnecessary amount of froufrou and tacky glam! What were they thinking?!

So onto my outfit, what did I wear? This scares me a little because I didn't spend a cent on my costume. Either the 80's was back in fashion or I was way out of fashion! 

I wore a pair of floral jeans that I bought brand new only a few months ago and, a top that I bought over a year ago but love it so much I wear it to death. This top is my go-to everyday any day kind of top. It was roomy enough to take me through two pregnancies and practical for breastfeeding and looked great paired with denim shorts. But having now worn it with my floral jeans I feel like I have committed a huge fashion crime! 

My shoes were hot pink chucks (Which seemed to have stayed in fashion for years!), earrings were from an 80's hens party from a few years back, pearl necklace and bangles were items pulled from my everyday accessories stash  and, my silver handbag is a bag I've been using on a daily basis since I bought it a few months ago! And well, it wasn't the 80's without big hair so I pulled out my trusty crimping iron and tied part of it up into a very dorky do. 

My makeup was probably a little underwhelming for the 80's but I did the best I could with the colours I could find in my make up kit. I used pastel purple, pink and yellow for my eyes, heavily applied blusher and the brightest pink lipstick I owned.

Having arrived at the party it felt as though I had walked into a crazy period of time! Everywhere I looked there was big hair, dorky side ponies, guys in tight short shorts, girls with heavily applied makeup, guys with creepy mullets and mustaches and just way too many bright colours! Everyone truly looked great crazy in their outfits. 

IT WAS SUCH A FUN NIGHT, and as dorky and bogan I think the 80's to be, I think I understand why the fashion took off. In my 80's attire among other 80's party goers I felt young, bright, bubbly, expressed, eccentric and fun! 

Thanks to the talents of my hubby here are a few pics of how I looked. To protect the privacy of others I haven't posted any photos from the party.

Why I'm Quitting Sugar

I grew up in a family of 'fit' people. My dad and Two of my three brothers seem to have metabolisms that never allow them to carry excess weight, even if they sat around eating hot chips and gravy all day! My other brother, sister and mum are all fit people too, but more of the realistic kind. Like me they work hard to keep fit. Mum dances, walks and does yoga, Jake will run 10 kms up a mountain and Bec has been involved with exercises of the more 'fun' kind like Zumba and spinning (maybe not so fun). Dad, Matthew (brother not hubby) and Samuel, well they are the cool kids who surf and do extreme sports like mountain bike riding down mt. Ousley. They lift weights because they don't have kilos to loose, only muscle to build.

And me, well before moving out of home 6 years ago I was fit too but I didn't work out and the only exercise I did was jogging or walking. But I did eat well and maintained a tiny waist. When I hit the 18-19 mark I noticed a change in my body. I started to fill out and I felt my metabolism slow down. I'd say this would be normal for females at that age. I also found it hard to keep fit and I've only dabbled in exercise like zumba, yoga, polercise, dancing and attending the gym. And although I've never increased a dress size and eat healthy meals I've become a huge sugar addict! In fact I've been a sugar addict since my teenage years, it just didn't seem to affect me as much then. I'm addicted to eating chocolate and lollies on an almost daily basis and its draining my energy and good health! My dad was also a sweet tooth but at nearly 65 years old he is a 'fit freak of nature'! 

My dad lives and breaths all things healthy, he still surfs and his body is ripped! I'm not sure I can even imagine my dad getting sick or ever dying, I'm convinced he'll live forever. 

Because dad lives such a healthy lifestyle its something he doesn't stop talking about or giving advice on. There is not a phone call where my dad doesn't ask me if I'm eating healthy and exercising regularly and, if my husband is also looking after his well-being. He even asks about what our kids are eating! There isn't a parcel I don't receive that doesn't contain health food magazines, protein foods or exercise equipment.

Some years back this really bothered me. I felt like I must have been fat or looking out of shape for my dad to be so full on with my eating habits and my exercise regime. I would say that I probably resented him a little because of it. I knew I wasn't overweight but why was he so concerned? Don't all men know that the way to make a girl feel like crap is to talk about her weight and health?!

Well, I've grown up and matured a little and can see that dad isn't trying to make me feel self conscious about how I look (he thinks his daughter is gorgeous after all) but he is trying to teach me to be conscious about my health and eating habits. He too knows what its like to crave sugar and whilst I think he doesn't have to work hard to be fit, he would tell me otherwise. It is hard work and it does take motivating, mentoring and commitment. 

I am 24. I am female. I am curvy... and I love my body! I'm not into recreating my figure, I like it and I can appreciate that God has created us all to be different and, beautiful in our own way. We're not all meant to be tall, thin dark haired beauties! But of course if I could have designed my own body shape than I'd probably change a few things, that's the 'human' in me. 

I'm not quitting sugar because I need to loose weight specifically, I'm quitting sugar because I want to be healthier, fitter and more energized. I also want to tone up and build strength so, I'm committing to just 30 mins of exercise each day.

So what am I doing exactly? I'm following Sarah Willson's "I Quit Sugar" 8 week detox program.

"Sarah's down-to-earth, practical approach

 makes the sugar-quitting process doable, 

while her recipes make it fun."

David Gillespie author of Sweet Poison and Big Fat Lies

So far, I can say that it's a great book and easy to follow. It doesn't have a 'cold turkey' approach and its not a fancy overdressed or overwhelming program. It really is down to earth. I know a few people who have done the program and they only have good things to say about it. 

Matt has decided to do the detox program also. He unlike me isn't a sugar addict but he does want to be healthier and, lose weight in order to reveal his hidden six pack. The program also helps with weight loss.
We've taken a picture of our current (soon to be before) bodies and recorded our weight and measurements. We intend to update with healthier and fitter stats!

Cravings are hard to overcome and exercise is hard to commit to so I'm blogging my way through the program to help me stay focused and motivated. And knowing there are a bunch of people reading this makes me determined to not fail. You all may think you are doing nothing to help me but in fact you are silently motivating me!

And... just a shout out to me friend Emma! I don't know what it is because your health spamming should really annoy me, but you've inspired me. Maybe its our similar body shapes, or that we used to 'pig out' on sour warheads and sour straps together?! hehe

Date Night Planning

In a recent post last week I wrote about the new found importance of dating my husband continuously for our entire married lives. 
We've decided to have weekly date nights to help us be more deliberate about spending quality time together. Quality time that doesn't consist of constant facebook checking, email and blog writing, instagram posting, news reading and or TV watching! There's something very refreshing about spending time together where our minds aren't constantly buzzing with media 'noise'.  Oh, and without the noise of precious little ones. 

We've chosen Monday nights to be our date night. It's often the day I don't take the boys out for any activities; it’s our home day after coming off of a busy weekend. It’s also the day Matt takes the car to work which means no drop off and pick up for me. I can spend the afternoon preparing a nice meal for Matt and I and make sure Rupert has dinner that bit early so that Matt and I can eat alone. 

It’s really quite simple having a date night. Babies fed and in bed. TV turned off. Phones and ipads out of reach. Nice dinner prepared. And an activity if we so wish. 

Although nice, date nights don't have to be an expensive fine dining experience or a movie on the big screen. It can be done in the comfort of your own home. 

Last week we had a baked dinner with a glass of wine and played a few games of chess. Monday night just gone we again had a nice dinner with wine and did a puzzle together. We didn't get to finish the puzzle - its 1000 pieces! 

Here is what we've got planned for our date nights in the month of August. It's simple and achievable.

5th - 1000 pc Puzzle

12th - Make sushi together. Something neither of us have done.

19th - Watch a movie "Star Trek Into Darkness" (see what a good wife I am :-P)
26th - Zumba workout

50 Things About Me

1. Dated Matt for 13 months.
2. Engaged for 14 months.
3. Married for nearly 4 years.
4. I have 2 sons Rupert and Samson, born 14 months apart.
5. Purchased our first house in early 2013.
6. My favourite colour is red.
7. I once had my hair cut to replicate that of Julie Andrews in the sound of music. Biggest hair fail!
8. Mother by occupation.
9. Law school dropout.
10. Seamstress by trade.
11. Vomited on my first date with Matt.
12. I love chocolate.
13. I think blonde is sexy, brunette sophisticated and I can never decide which I prefer to be?
14. I have 4 siblings and 7 niblings.
15. Retro is my style.
16. Vintage my love.
17. I like wearing lacey nanna nickers.
18. I have a scar on my shoulder from a scooter accident which gets mistaken for a hicky.
19. My favourite flower is the tulip.
20. I dislike tardiness.
21. I’m not often seen without wearing makeup.
22. As a little child I was extremely shy, people wondered if I could actually talk!
23. I dislike being called 'Jess'!
24. I was homeschooled after year 4.
25. I would love to raise a big family!
26. A white lone hair grows on my shoulder; I call it my ‘lucky’ hair!
27. My maid of honour pulled out my 1 ½ inch long ‘lucky’ hair on my wedding day! It grew back.
28. I only like to drink hot beverages from a teacup.
29. I love opera.
30. When I was a teenager I wanted to become an opera singer.
31. I can’t sing!
32. My husband is a very talented muso.
33. I’m a crazy dancer.
34. I like wearing red lipstick.
35. I threw cupcakes at my wedding.
36. My jewellery style is ‘art deco’.
37. I love all things crafty such as knitting, crocheting, sewing, quilting and random DIY projects.
38. I dislike scrapbooking but do it occasionally.
39. I like dressing up.
40. I would like to do some maternity modelling.
41. I don’t like printed t-shirts
42. It’s not Christmas without a homemade pavlova.
43. I like walnut stained furniture.
44. My dad buys me a new watch every Christmas.
45. My favourite book is “The Cat of Bubastes” by G A Henty.
46. I learnt to play piano and the trumpet.
47. My most desired appliance is a red KitchenAid stand mixer.
48. I’m a big Tupperware fan.
49. I like watching period dramas.
50. I like spicy food. 

Fall in Love Again and Again...

One baby is okay, very manageable but 2 babies well that's a juggle. You are feeding one baby and hubby is wrangling the other baby who seems to have more energy than would be considered normal! You no longer hold hands with your sweetheart because someone is pushing the pram, holding the newborn or walking the child with ants in his pants.

When hubby gets home from work, it’s a passing kiss, quick hug and a sneaky pinch on the bum. It’s back to the stove where you've been cooking that Ossobuco for 3 hours, but surely it’s got to be done already!  You try to speed the process up cos it’s got to be on that Bunnykins plate asap and then has to be put in the freezer for a 1 min to cool. There are tiny fingers waiting anxiously for his dinner and it doesn't matter how many times you say the word "patience", he just aint getting it. So, out of the freezer and onto the table, we try and say grace as a family but we must keep one eye open for the little Bunnykins fork that is nearly poking us in the eye. Seriously, how do you teach a 16 month old patience! We chow down dinner and by now it’s nearing 6:30pm and that's a good thing. Rupert takes a book from the shelf and hops onto daddy's knee for his bedtime story in the bedroom. Daddy reads him the same book he chose the night before, and the night before that and… the night before that! But that's okay, daddy doesn't even need to read, he knows this book off by heart. Into bed, lights out and we're one down one more to go! A quick tidy up in the play room oops sorry no, that's actually our lounge and dinning but only takes a few minutes and we can see that.

Life is certainly fuller with children, it’s challenging, rewarding, tiring, fascinating and exciting and, whilst you may miss the good old days before babies, you never seem to regret having them.

The stats say that the divorce rate in mature age couples is rising. Parents have invested so much love and time into their children (not a bad thing) that once they're no longer living at home they discover their marriage to be somewhat estranged. Life has been so full and busy with raising children that they forgot to continue growing their relationship and friendship.

Matt and I haven't even been parents for 2 years and we already understand these stats. We have a good loving and committed relationship but we don't 'date' anymore. Holding the title of husband and wife and mother and father, we seem to think we're qualified for eternal love and happiness. Not so.

I believe in falling in love with just 'one' person but I also believe you need to fall in love with that person many times over.

 I fell head over heels for Matt when we were dating and it’s for that reason I wanted to know more about him. It’s called dating. But why is it that after marriage we no longer see the need to date and continue to get to know each other? After all we're still individuals and we are still growing and changing.

I am a wife before I'm a mother! My husband comes before my children and when my relationship with Matt is being nurtured and growing strong it allows us to be good parents. We can then be good examples of love and commitment to our sons.

When Matt and I were dating I asked him what his favourite food was, his answer was "donuts". A few years passed and I asked him again, the answer was still "donuts"! But then I asked him just a few days ago and his answer was no longer the same, his favourite food had changed. My husband’s favourite food was now "hot chips"(of all things)! If I had not asked I would have assumed donuts to be his favourite for many more years to come.

 I want to know my husband both through his unchanging habits and through his changing likes.

So, we've decided to date again! We're introducing date nights. A concept not unfamiliar to many of you but for us it is new. With the birth of Rupert we didn't seem to feel the need but when Samson came along we began to feel the stretch of marriage, it subtly becomes all about bedtime stories, dirty nappies, baby babel and milestones. But when there are no more dirty nappies and you no longer have little children to read bedtime stories to, what will we do with ourselves? We must start now. We must engage in each other’s interests together. We must continuously date and fall in love so that when we are old we can show that we weren't just committed by law but that we have always loved as husband and wife should.

We shall never fall out of love but we will constantly try to fall in love again and again.

As it’s a new month I have started to write up a date night planner.  We have chosen Monday nights to be our “date night” and as we intend to have our date nights at home because it is logistically and financially easier, we are having to be a little creative. But this is for another post. Stay tuned.

on one of our dates back in 2007 just weeks after the Darwin Show ordeal.

Trips to the Show

Yesterday we took a family outing to the Royal Darwin Show. It was my third time going to the small country like show and it always brings back some funny memories. 

My first visit to the show was also my first date with Matt but I'll come back to that story in a bit. The second time we went to the show was the year I was pregnant with Rupert. I can recall Matt and I talking about how much more exciting it would be when we could bring our kids to the show. The dirty pens with ugly farm animals, the ginormous pumpkins, and the cheap worthless show bags would suddenly spark amazement in a small child's eyes. Well, two babies later we made our third trip to the show as parents but, before I tell you about how yesterday went let’s rewind back six years to 2007, my first visit to the Darwin Show.

In February 2007 I moved to Darwin and shortly afterwards met Matt through church and Uni events. We became friends. By about June/July our 'friendship' started to spark and before I knew it Matt was driving me to the Royal Darwin Show. 

I was feeling pretty good about this 'outing' to the show together and I made sure I was looking my best. I wore my long flowing hair out and had even purchased a new white top to wear. Little did I know about how much of a dust bowl this Darwin Show was, I was to soon find out it didn't even compare to the Sydney Royal Easter Show!

Back then I liked rides so, we bought some drinks and the adventure began. No food and one bottle of coke down we took to our third ride known as the 'Hurricane'. Big mistake! 

My mobile phone flew out of my bag, hitting Matt's head on its way to Timbuktu. I then began to feel very dizzy and light headed that I was soon leaning on Matt and could not compose myself. Matt was probably feeling a little bewildered by my sudden affection that had him squished to the side of the cart. Affection was not the intention, I felt as though I was dying and eventually I couldn't hold it in any longer. I vomited. And much vomit I vomited. As the Hurricane is still spinning in full motion my failed attempt to vomit over the outside of the cart resulted in the vomit flying back smack into my face, through my lovely long hair (that I wore out), onto my nice new white top, down my jeans and only just missing the people in the cart behind us! A lost phone, vomit all over me and barely able to walk, this was not going well. We headed for the toilets to get cleaned up but it got worse, we bumped into some friends of Matt's and with a face plastered in vomit I was introduced to them as his friend. Not cool and I've never been on another ride since!

Anyway we dated, became engaged and are now married; it didn't turn out too badly in the end. 

So, back to yesterdays visit to the show. It wasn't quite as great as I expected it to be, it seemed that Rupert was still just that bit too young to appreciate the animals and performances. He was fascinated at times and he did get to pat a baby chicken but was otherwise mostly restless and unhappy being stuck in the stroller. And when we had him out of the stroller he wanted to run among the crowds. It was was nice to be out on a family outing nonetheless and, we did get to enter some worthwhile competitions... fingers crossed!

Till next time... J x

Nanna - at My Age - in Her Day

It's been a little while since my last post and I was wondering what to blog about but, after a party we attended last night I was inspired to write about it. 

One of my dearest friends Siobhan whom I like to refer to as my 'sister-friend' (she's also my brother in-laws girlfriend) recently turned 21 and hosted a “Vintage Old Hollywood Glamour” party last night.

We were informed to dress for the occasion, encouraged to dress to the nines with no holding back! I may not have had to spend a cent on props for my costume and look but I did my best to look authentic of the glamorous bygone days of  the 1950's. 

The birthday girl and I.

As I did my hair up in pin curls yesterday morning, my thoughts strayed to my Nanna Bamford and what it was like for her - at my age - in her day! What did she do to prep for a fancy night out? Did she pin curl her hair too? What length would her dress have been and did she slip on a pair of elbow length gloves? My Nanna Kartawidjaja also comes to mind. It’s been said that I look a lot like her when she was young so, I've been turning the unit upside down desperately trying to find a small USB containing black and white photos of my grandparents when they were young, back in the 1940 - 1950's. I've had no success finding it so unfortunately I can't share them with you. I will however, share some photos of last night’s party.

So, here's how I got my look. 

In the morning I washed my hair and put it up in pin curls whilst still damp. If you've never pin curled before you can find out how here. It requires many bobby pins or flat prong clips and is a little fiddly but not too difficult. The brush out is the scariest part but also the easiest and, depending on how you brush the curls depends on the look you get.

In the afternoon when both boys were snoozing, I decided to put on my makeup. Doing make up isn't something I find difficult but using liquid eyeliner however, is quite the challenge! I generally only wear pencil eyeliner on the top inside of my eyelid, it gives subtle definition without looking heavy or making my eyes look smaller. But for those more special and fancy occasions I do bring out the liquid and, what I find best and easiest to use is Maybelline Master Precise Liquid Liner. It's more of a pen rather than a brush you have to dip in liquid. You'll all probably agree that the hardest part is getting that flick right so here's a good tutorial on 1950's make up which not only demonstrates the eye makeup but on getting the complete look..

Rupert taking on the role of photo bomber.

Now for the dress. It's not a dress that I've been overly fond of but I think I bought it for about $50 from "Noni B" when I was working there a few years back. I wore it to a friends wedding. It turned out to be perfect for last night’s occasion. The hemline sits at the traditional 1950's mid calf length, before dresses started to crop up to the knee. 

The heels were from "Forever New", bought for a wedding last year. They are what I'd call a 1950's "Spectator" style shoe/heel. They have a white toe so I thought I'd wear white elbow length gloves to tie it all together. The gloves used to belong to my grandmother, a little bit of special. 

I wanted my hair and makeup to be the outstanding feature of my look so I tried not to overdo it with accessories or by adding too many accents and colours. 

In my hair I placed an all-black flower and a simple but stunning necklace around my neck. I payed $4 for it from "Collete Hayman", it too was bought for a previous wedding. Around my waist was a thin black belt with a small silver buckle which tied in with the necklace.

So that was my look now, let’s talk party. When I get invited to fancy dress parties with a theme I often wonder how "themed" they will actually be. You kind of don't want to go all out if the host and others are only partly rising to the occasion but, knowing this birthday girl quite well, I knew it would be great! And if none of the other attendees were going all out she most certainly would be! 

The venue far exceeded my expectations! I'm not sure what I expected really?! I expected guests to be dressed in vintage glamour but never gave much thought to how the venue would look. Well, it looked amazing! As you entered the back yard through the carport you walked a red carpet that glowed with a row of tea lights either side and, when you got to the back yard it had been transformed into a stunning vintage styled restaurant/bar/club. There were small cafe tables set up with these simple but ever so effective table centers.  There were bench seats with with fairy lights draping from the trees and if it weren't for the Hollywood sign on the back fence, I'd say it felt a lot like Paris When it Sizzles! The music playing was iconic to the era and glancing around the yard to the back of the house there sat a screen playing "Breakfast at Tiffany's". I could have sworn it felt like I was sitting in a romantic restaurant with Audrey Hepburn across the table. 

The food was delicious and the guests looked vintage and glamorous.

Siobhan and Stuart (Matt's brother)

The birthday girl and also the star of the night looked stunningly gorgeous! Siobhan sported a very glamorous vintage dress which, by the way, she purchased from a vintage store in Germany! Can't get much more authentic than that! I didn't examine it but it looked like red shot taffeta or satin with a beautiful black lace overlay which sparkled with black sequins. Siobhan’s hair was very sleek and very 1950’s; it had an element of Dita von Teese. She wore sweet pearls around her neck (maybe there’s a story behind those?) and shiny black elbow length gloves with an eye-catching diamante bracelet. Her shoes were black peep toes. She looked incredible!

There were some lovely speeches and a video taking us through Siobhan’s 21 years on earth... and then... we hit the expiry time. That time when little babies are crying, falling over, getting irritable and well, ready for bed!

A lovely night had.   

Once a Month Cooking

When we had Rupert the three of us spent 5 days in hospital with delicious meals brought to my bedside each day. But when it was time to leave and bring our little one home and Matty was to return to work, reality set in and, I didn't know how on earth I would manage cooking as well as being a new mum! Somehow the thought of cooking was one that was very overwhelming. 

We were so grateful for our church family who cooked us yummy meals which kept coming for about 2 weeks... so very blessed.

This time round I decided to plan ahead. I spent a weekend cooking meal after meal and it was the best thing I could have done. Samson is over 2 weeks old and I still haven't had the need to cook. I cooked enough to cover us for about a month. Although I certainly feel that I would be capable of cooking if had to (definitely not as overwhelming second time round), its just nice to not have to worry in these early weeks. 

The idea of 'once a month' cooking and meal planning has worked so well that I think I might do it on a regular basis, not every month but possibly every second month.

On my weekend of cooking I created a very delicious and easy recipe for 'Honey Mustard Drumsticks' - thats what you do when you haven't got the 'Chicken Tonight' jar in your cupboard. Hehe.

Honey Mustard Drumsticks Author Mama Essy (Jessica Kartawidjaja-Fong)

Ingredients

8-10 chicken drumsticks

1 1/2 tbl Whole grain mustard

1 tbl Dijon mustard

1 tbl white vinegar

2 tsp mixed herbs

1/4 cup honey

Method

Combine all ingredients together. Mix well and pour over drumsticks. Bake in a glass baking dish until cooked through (I think it took about 40-50 mins in our oven).

Tip: make marinade ahead of time, place in a bag with drumsticks, mix through and store in the fridge for 2 hours before baking.

Our Newest Addition

Well its been a little while since my last post so I thought I better not delay any longer and give you all a quick update. If you've liked my Facebook Page you're probably already up to date with my regular happenings.

I actually started writing this post a few days ago and was going to give a slightly more detailed post on the pregnancy and birth of our newest addition. However, I've since felt that its okay to not disclose 'everything'. To be honest, giving birth is something I know to be very traumatic and, that doesn't mean I've had terrible birthing experiences, its actually quite the opposite. I consider both of my babies births to have been very smooth but, there's something about the experience that makes me want to shudder at the very thought. And just thinking about it makes me almost cry to remember the pain and hardship that natural childbirth is. Both my pregnancies had its challenges and hurdles to overcome but, I am thankful that nothing is too big for my God. He has shone His grace and mercies through the skills of my obstrician and midwives.

So now I will introduce to you... Samson Brian! 

Born via natural birth with no drugs on Tuesday 30th April 2013 at 12:20pm. Weighing 3.08kg and 48cm long. He is our little olive skinned baby with almost black hair and dark brown eyes. He is perfect in every way, not that I would expect any less from a creator who sends us everything good and perfect! And not always what we might consider perfect but what he gives us to show us what it is to be perfect in the eyes of God. I say this because I'm aware that there are parents out their who's babes may have been born with a condition that challenges them and, may think that its well and good for me to say how perfect my healthy child is and that I don't know what it is to see them suffer. I don't know. But I know that whatever challenges are put in my/our path, are there to strengthen my character and trust in God.

Our little family is most grateful to God for blessing us with another son and brother for Rupert. 

40 weeks

1 day old

Samson's 1st bath

Toddler Cooking

My son Rupert is 13 months old and has been eating solids for sometime now and only has a cup of milk after his meal.

For snacks he loves a variety of fruits, sultanas, rice cakes, cheese and plain biscuits. Breakfast usually consists of toast with either Vegemite, Promite or peanut butter or, Weet-Bix with yogurt and milk of course. Lunch is a sandwich with one of the already mentioned spreads, sometimes adding cheese or sliced banana. For dinner I usually pull out a frozen meal which is a concoction of vegetables and fruit. 

Rupert goes to bed at 6:30pm so he usually has dinner between 5:30 - 6pm and so, I found it convenient to cook up a big batch of this vegetable "concoction" once a fortnight, separating into individual meal portions and freezing.

I'll also mention that I often mix his meals around and give him his vegetables at lunch instead of dinner. If I know we'll be out for the evening its easier (and cleaner) to pack a sandwich for his dinner. 

This vegetable concoction I make may contain all or a variety of the following ingredients: pumpkin, potato, carrot, peas, pasta, chicken, tin tomatoes, apple, pear. It then all gets boiled in one big pot!

The reason for me writing this post is because I've come to realize that I should be making meals of more variety and textures. I have occasionally tried different dishes such as spag bol but Rupert has not liked it and probably because I have made it too flavoursome. So, I've decided I need to introduce more foods and meats but still keeping it simple and somewhat bland until he can acquire a taste for these new ingredients. 

People have given me many suggestions and ideas which I love to take on board but then I have considered what my sons eating habits, likes and dislikes are and come up with 2 recipes that I think will be a good start for Rupert. 

Now, yesterday I cleaned out the fridge and I've realized a grocery shop is needed so, the below recipes are of what I could find in the fridge and cupboards. I would have liked to have added more vegetable varieties. But my main aim was to come up with recipes that contained minced beef and tuna and I have managed to do that.
At 13 months Rupert isn't quite old enough to eat like a gentleman but is old enough to want to try so, I've opted to chop the vegetables chunky so that he can easily grasp with his fingers. 

Tuna & Tomato Risotto 

Author: Mama Essy

Ingredients

1 onion, chopped

1 garlic clove, crushed

1 cup uncooked rice, cooked

2 celery sticks, chopped

1 carrot, chopped

2 small potatoes, diced

1/4 cup frozen peas

2/3 cup canned kidney beans, drained

1 cup vegetable stock

1 400g tin diced tomatoes

1 185g tin tuna in springwater, drained

1/4 Parmesan cheese

Method

In a large saucepan fry onion and garlic until soft. Stir in rice, tomatoes and stock. Bring to boil. Reduce heat and add peas, celery, carrot, potato and kidney beans. Cover and simmer for about 30 - 45 mins. 

Stir through tuna and Parmesan cheese.

Savoury Mince with Pasta

Author: Mama Essy

Ingredients

1-2 cups uncooked pasta (I used combination of brown and white), cooked

500g mince beef

1 onion, chopped

1 garlic clove, crushed

1 170g tin tomato paste

1/2 cup water - stock added optional

1 carrot, chopped

2 potatoes, diced

1/2 cup frozen peas

Method

In a large saucepan fry onion and garlic until soft. Add mince and cook until browned. Stir through tomato paste and water. Add carrot, potatoes and peas. Stir through cooked pasta.

Was It Everything I expected it to be?

Recently some girlfriends and I went and saw the new Aussie movie Goddess. It was a lovely somewhat light hearted movie which had its pros and cons. It was about a mother of twins who had put her career on hold to be the primary carer of her toddlers until they were school age and, the movie tells of her struggles of being home and of missing her love of singing and performing, her career that is.

It got me thinking about how I felt about being a stay at home mother after 14 months of not being at work and of continuously changing nappies, wiping drooling mouths, soothing teary eyes and rarely sleeping in past 7am?! Was motherhood all it was cracked up to be? Did I get any nasty reality checks that made me think "why am I here"? And did I miss having a job to go to outside of the home?

As I sat in the cinema asking myself if motherhood was all I expected it to be, I instantly came up with the answer "yes"! Although I've had/have many challenges and frustrations along the way (and more to come I'm sure) that, sometimes I even think it would be easier to work an 8 hour shift in the office, I still would not trade 'my stay at home mum' status for a million bucks. I don't miss work and I don't crave a career other then my calling to be a full time home maker. My family, my kitchen and my home are my career and I want to be constantly striving to be better at what I do.

As I continue to ponder my thoughts on having become a new mum just over 12 months ago I can't help but think that my 'empowering' experience as a first time mum would not have been so wonderful without the support of my husband, the backbone of our family. Although Matty in the kitchen cooking may cause a near domestic and for me to suffer a stress attack (hehe) he nevertheless is extremely helpful around the home. On days when he isn't working till past 7 he is otherwise home in time to give Rupert his dinner and shower (something I'm finding rather difficult to do at nearly 9 months pregnant). I am very thankful for the wonderful  husband and father he is.

What was becoming a first time mum like for you? Was is what you expected (whether you resumed work or stayed at home)? Are you a mum who likes her outside job or are you a mum who prefers to be at home? If there's one thing I've learnt its that we are all different and what works for one family may not for another.

Well I must sign off here as I have much to do!
Last night I was awake 3 times with a series of contractions or braxton hicks which started to worry me a little because, with Rupert I never got braxton hicks until days leading up to his birth! I have much more nesting to do before baby can come!
I haven't yet cleaned out the fridge or finished cleaning out a couple of draws, the floors haven't even been cleaned once this week ( I often do it twice a week), my legs needed shaving and my hair is unwashed! ... I'm just not ready yet!

Preparing for Our New Addition

So with just 6 weeks to go I think it's due time I organised my bag for the hospital!

 I don't claim to be an expert after just having one baby however, I'm feeling a lot more prepared mentally and know what to expect this time round. 

I know that in my bag I will need:

• fruit. 
• lollies.
• light snacks.
• own water bottle - the plastic cups can be a little small and flimsy for such an active event!
• large box of disposable nursing pads - don't know about you but new mum's can make a ton of milk and those pads need changing many times a day! And unlike the cloth pads (which are good when your milk flow slows down) they also prevent leaking through your clothes.
• cotton nightie with spaghetti straps - great for when your getting in and out of the bath because you can just hitch it up. Also easy to slip off the shoulder for babies first feed.
• gym pants or tights - I found these to be the comfiest after labour. They sit firm around your belly which, feels good when the skin is loose and you still look 4- 6 months pregnant. Its a good idea if they are black (pads don't always hold everything) and if you wear long tops over them. Visitors don't want to see how big those maternity pads are! 
• comfy maternity bra.
• slippers and socks.
• maternity pads - several packets, no explanation needed!
• make-up is a must for me! I was in hospital for 5 days with Rupert and it was so nice to get up each morning and make myself look pretty, which then made me feel good. 
• body wash - the most beautiful smelling wash you can find. Nothing too strong (subtle is best) and no perfumes but something that will make you feel like a gorgeous mama.
• change of clothes for hubby - even if your only in hospital for the day. Changing newborns nappies can be messy!
• beanie for bub. 
• size 0000 wondersuit - several if your going to be in hospital for a few days.
• baby singlet.
• baby socks or booties - hospitals are freezing!
• blanket/muslin wrap or in my case I'll be packing an Ergo Cocoon  - they are magic!
• baby thermometer - not needed at the hospital but something you should have handy at home.
• disposable nappies - cloth nappies are provided while your in hospital and are preferred for the first several days so, you can easily monitor babies "movements" but you'll need your own nappy for the ride home.

Well I think I'll end my list there. No doubt there are a few things missing but otherwise a good start for packing my bag for the hospital.

Comment with your own packing tips and preferences. This is what I've come up with after my experience with Rupert but every mum is different and, I'd love to know what worked for you.

Mama Essy

Rupert the day he was born.

28 Days of Thankfulness

In my last post 2013 A Year of Faith I wrote of the three things I wanted to commit to during 2013 (and hopefully the rest of my life). But there's also another area of my life I'd like to be better at and that is to be thankful in all circumstances good and bad.

There are often things going on in my life that I wish I could do without and as a result I waste my energy on complaining and being frustrated about it. Whilst there are things that warrant complaining and then reforming/changing, there are also things I can not control and therefore shouldn't let it consume me. I've come up with my own motto to help me along the way...

 'If I'm not happy, [seek God] change it and be happy. If I can't change it, stop complaining and find something to be thankful for'.

Throughout my life there have been things (big and small) I didn't like or enjoy and made me somewhat unhappy. My unhappiness can take such a hold of me that I forget the things that are going well in my life and, the blessings I should be thanking God for.

One thing that makes me frustrated is the Darwin wet season weather which isn't actually very wet at the moment but, is certainly very hot! So hot it drives me insane and there are days I want to scream! But, I can't change the weather so, I should instead channel my energy to something I can be thankful for. 

Another 'thing' that had me unhappy and in discomfort was our mattress. It was only a very basic and cheap mattress which was bought over 3 1/2 years ago and, for the most part an okay bed to sleep on. However, since being married and having 2 in the bed, being on my second pregnancy which has resulted in chronic back pain and, also a childhood injury that tends to flare up, this too would make me unhappy. A good night sleep is one of life's must haves! This 'unhappiness' in my life was something that I could change so we did. We bought a good comfy mattress and I sleep better as a result. There was no need to keep complaining if we could do something about it.

Although these examples may be small and petty things to some they have actually been issues in my life that make me not such a great person to be around. If I don't like something than I should change it and if I can't change it I should get over it and be thankful for the good things in life.

Having said all this I still want to pray and ask for Gods will and guidence before changing anything in my life, it's important to consult God in all things. The weather and a bed may not be big things or issues but moving house or changing jobs are. It's important to always seek out Gods will as sometimes he gives us challenges and trials to build our faith, contentment and character so, maybe there are times that the things we can change shouldn't be changed?!

For the coming month of February I have set myself a challenge to be consciously thankful for at least one thing each day - 28 days of thankfulness. On days when I'm feeling tested and frustrated I shall remember to divert my thoughts and energy to being happy about something. 

If you'd like to follow my challenge you can follow me on Instagram under essiefong. If you'd like to join the challenge using Instagram then be sure to tag #28daysofthankfulness. Challenge will commence Feb 1st.

xxx

2013 A Year of Faith!

Like a lot of people when a year is coming to a close I often think of the things I might want to implement and/or achieve in the new year ahead. A lot of the time new years resolutions are great for the first month or two and then they slowly fall to the wayside for the remainder of the year. 

So, this time round I was cautious to not making too many demands on 2013 and have them hyped up only to be forgotten after a short while. But there were a few things I wanted to commit to this year, one being a commitment to read my Bible daily and the other was to pray more and to be faith driven.

BIBLE, read daily

I fail at this every year so, I tried to think of why it has failed in past years and to make it not fail this year! I've usually followed chronological reading plans but would then become bored of the theme or book. To fix this I decided that this year I would try the One Year Bible reading plan which consists of four readings (can't get bored with that), Old Testament, New Testament, Psalms and Proverbs. I am loving it and I have been able to take something away from my readings each day. It's important to me that I open my heart, mind, soul, body and spirit to hear Gods voice each time I read His word. It's often too easy to just read with my eyes and think with my head, without being open to hearing what God is trying to show or teach me from his word. 

PRAY more

I have this thing with prayer where I only feel worthy enough to pray for forgiveness and to thank God for the things I already have. Even though I'm great at complaining and whinging about things, I know that I am blessed far beyond my needs and, only have to glance at the photo of our sponsor child on the fridge to be reminded. When it comes to prayer requests I feel I already have so much and, shouldn't bother God with things that I think I need especially when there may be others with greater needs. For example; why should I pray for God to provide us with a house when there are many who live in poverty and slum? I tend to think that if I want something then I should get it myself and shouldn't bother with asking for Gods help.

Well this year I am committing to taking all my needs and desires before God, both big and small! I also want to remember to pray diligently before making decisions. God may not always give me all the things I desire but I pray also for contentment and the desire for His will only. 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6

FAITH driven

This year in 2013 I am committing to trusting in God in everything and for anything! 

My need for faith kind of goes hand in hand with my need for more praying. I may not always feel deserving but God still wants me to have faith in all things. 

I have faith that in 2013 God will provide the safe delivery of baby #2. I have faith God will keep my husband in a good job. I have faith that our finances will allow me to continue as a stay at home mum. And I have faith that health will not prevent more children after baby #2. These are just a few things that cause worry but must be replaced with prayer and faith. Whatever Gods will, I will have faith and I will trust that He has it all under control! Faith, that God will get us through the good and the bad times.

For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.” 

Matthew 17:20

“To learn strong faith is to endure great trials. I have learned my faith by standing firm amid severe testings.” ~ George Mueller